Post-Thanksgiving

Aaron made a fantastic Thanksgiving dinner with a Carmel Chocolate Pecan Pie. Here is Emma "hugging" it.

Other photos from the weekend... Olivia signing "Help" (hands on chest) and trying to play peek-a-boo (not quite grasping she is supposed to cover her eyes).

Also, here is our tree... note the total lack of ornaments at the bottom. When Emma was a toddler I was really bummed out about not being able to decorate the tree and house. I have now accepted this and am fine with our naked tree (it is real - Aaron cut it down himself).

Oh, and most importantly - I cut Emma's hair (she loves it - she thinks she looks like a teenager).

Potty

This may fall into the too much information category but Olivia has officially started using the potty (for number 1 and 2)! Have I mentioned that she is 15 months old?? I know saying this will jinx me now and she will be in diapers till she is 4 1/2.

Ok so this picture has nothing to do with using the potty, but I thought it was cute.

Date Night!

So, after 6 1/2 years of parenting Aaron and I decided that we need to make getting out without the kids a priority. This past weekend was the second time we went out. We decided to go to a real grown up restaurant that was not child friendly. We went to Mrs. K's Toll House in Silver Spring (we drive by it all the time and have always been curious about it).

We had the babysitter come at 3 to maximize the amount of time we had out post-Olivia's nap and pre-bedtime. So this meant that we needed to find someplace to go and hang out (and preferably have a drink) before dinner. We decided to go to the Piratz Tavern down the road from the restaurant. Ok, so it was a little high on the cheese factor, but the food was good and the drink that I had (it was called a "666") was awesome (I am totally going to be trying to make that one here).

Dinner afterwards was fantastic! Delicious and romantic. It was just refreshing to get out and have an adult evening!

Baby Emma

I was looking at some old pictures yesterday of Emma as a baby (not too much older than Olivia is now). What a cutie!

a little freaked

Ok, so for a while we have been trying to get Emma involved with something. Swimming? Dance? Art? Anything maybe to stop her from saying how bored she is and to pry her away from the tv. Should I say that getting out of the house has not been high on my priority list this past year. So, I mentioned joining brownies (or the younger version - Daisys) as they got a flier sent home from school about it.

Soooo... we attended a meeting last wednesday. The troop leader was just a little unsettling to me for some reason. Aaron initially said that I was being snobby. The parents there were normal. The girls there were normal. The leader and all of her assistants were, um, annoying and just left me feeling a little weird (more of a feeling than what I can describe in words). Maybe it was that the leader said that she doesn't tolerate loud children (try stopping 20 5 and 6 year olds from being loud). Maybe it was because she essentially threatened all the parents into signing up for volunteering (or she would sign us up). I am not sure but I seriously was on the verge of an anxiety attack by the time I went home. Emma was totally psyched about the group (I was hoping that she would think it was *boring* like everything else). No such luck.

So, 3:00am this morning I realized something. I knew this woman... go back 6 years. We are interviewing in-home child care providers for Emma as an infant. I realized that THIS was the woman. I looked her up to verify. Among other things she she said to us that we essentially didn't know what we were doing as new parents and she would show us how to parent (she was pregnant with her 5th child at the time). She also said to Emma (a 3 month old) something about how we must not give her any toys and she must be bored (because we didn't have one of those toy bars on her car seat). Aaron and I essentially thought this woman was a complete loon and immediately discounted her.

6 years later I am dealing with her again. I CANNOT go back to this group. I am desperately trying to find another option, but am having a heck of a time. Of course Emma has asked every day when she can go back. Ug.

Please tell me that you guys wouldn't go back either!

Date Night!!

Ok, it was more like a date *afternoon*, but whatever. Despite me still getting over the worst illness I have had in a few years, Aaron and I actually went on a real live date with a real live babysitter watching the girls last weekend. Emma even asked afterwards if we held hands and kissed afterwards - which she noted was GROSS.

It was low key with going out to dinner at a new local restaurant (just ok), getting coffee and dessert at hole in the wall diner (Excellent), and taking a walk at a nearby park (Awesome).

Kind of like when we went away for the weekend recently, I feel like my soul is rested. We needed that! We are planning a standing date monthly!!

First Grade...

Is exhausting! She fell asleep at 7:30 tonight.

One Year Old!

Ok, I am a few days early, but Olivia is about to turn one on Tuesday. Wow this year has gone by so fast!

Just one Thing - July

We finally got our new airconditioner. Why it is "just one thing" this month - we are no longer spewing/leaking ozone out of our old unit and we are being much more energy efficient.

Bonus for this month - I finally picked up some of those Dryer Balls I have been looking at. I have no idea if they actually take 25% less energy or not. My first few loads of laundry didnt have static cling which was good. Aaron was not a fan saying that his (still stinky no matter how many times I wash them) running shirts were also not very soft. Does anyone else have any experience with these things??

A Sense of Place

Lately I have been disenchanted by where I live (maybe some of you out there are not very surprised by that). I mean this in a broader sense (not just by what our neighborhood looks like, etc.). Increasing lately we have been spending more time in Greenbelt. Emma has been taking swim lessons there, she is going to art camp there (we took pottery classes there when I was pregnant with her), and we have been going to their farmers market. In spending time there I see people waving to each other, connecting to each other, and I get a feeling that there is a sense of place with the resources and the connectiveness with the community.

I am sure that this is partly "the grass is always greener" type issue because I am sure that there are people here that feel similarly to me in how they view their community. Maybe I am just close enough to politics in College Park that I can see how things stall and how it is seemingly impossible to make progress, yet not engrossed enough in the politics to make any change. I am involved enough to make some small change, but see how few people in this community seem to be concerned with making change (Greenbelt is a more "green" and "crunchy" community than College Park).

So lately I have been obsessed in my mind in finding a location where I feel more of a sense of place - a place where I enjoy to be, a place that provides opportunities and activities, a place where we can actually find jobs, and a place that is actually affordable (we could move to any number of places around the DC area that fit the bill if we weren't concerned with putting food on the table).

At the same time Aaron and I are SO conservative with making decisions (it took us 7 years to decide to rennovate the kitchen). We bumped into parents of a child from daycare last night. They were telling us that they bought a house in Fairfax county. They havent moved, they havent sold their house yet (they dont know yet if they will just try to rent it out), they dont know where their daughter will start kindergarten in the fall (there or here). They were a bit concerned over these decisions but they made the jump regardless. Aaron and I would never do that - we just think about things (probably way) too much.

So, I am sure that we will spend another 8 years in this house until I am able to find a place that fits and I am able to feel a "sense of place".

Perspective

I have been thinking about this for a while. A number of unrelated yet related events occurred over the past year. All of these things have given me much more perspective on my life. Additionally, evaluating my current surroundings (and the many single and/or childless people I seem to be surrounded by) I am forced to remember to put everything in perspective as well.

Just over a year ago a trio of events occurred. I found out in May that my thesis advisor had passed away. This was so incredibly shocking to me. I think of all the people I have worked with over the years she is the one person I can really say I thought of as a mentor. She impressed me as a young grad student when one day she admitted to me that I knew more than she knew on this one topic we were discussing. What? It is ok to admit that? Her ability to admit that, ask for more information, and work with those that complemented her own knowledge has really colored how my own career. I hadn't spoken to her since just after Emma was born and she had commented on some photos I had sent her. I was so deeply sad that I wasn't able to share the birth of my second child with her. She was young (49), fit (I remember her riding her bike with bike trailer including two not too tiny sons in it up and down the hills of Athens Ohio years ago) and had a heart attack. That puts things in perspective doesn't it?

About a month later my co-worker (who's baby was due a month before Olivia) lost their son during childbirth. Clearly this was a devastating tragedy to him and his wife, but it also impacted me deeply. I was a month away from delivering Olivia. It scared the hell out of me. This has also colored this past year. There have been many, many nights (if not every night since Olivia has been born) that she hasn't woken me up in the middle of the night and I have thought that I am lucky that I CAN get up in the middle of the night with her. I cannot help but think how is it possible to cope and move on after something like that?

The weekend after this happened we went out of town (to WV) to get away one more time before the baby was born. After taking a drive in the local state park Aaron started losing vision, memory, couldn't read words. As I thought he was having a stroke we rushed to the nearest hospital. He has since been cleared of serious medical conditions (other than migraines), but that experience also provided some serious perspective to cherishing him and our family.

This photo is sitting on the mountain the day after this event. I clearly remember sitting here in peace and sorting through all of the events that I have mentioned here. So although these were all very sad/stressful/tragic events I have sorted through them, dwelled on them, evaluated them over the past year.

I don't mean this to be sad (although there is sadness here) but more about how fortunate I feel that I feel like I escaped tragedy myself or grazed it just slightly and how fortunate I have been to do so. Recently a colleague of mine (whos son was born the day after Olivia) was diagnosed with retinal cancer and I again was reminded to really appreciate how fortunate I have been. I cannot imagine little Livvy going through chemotherapy at this age.

So I don't mean to be a huge downer but I want to remember these things, sort them out in my mind and put them in a place that will allow me to maintain perspective on the daily ups and downs in my own life.

Just One Thing - April and May

Ok, I know I am behind.... my just one thing for May was forcing myself to wash the laundry in cold water (saving electricity). I am in charge of washing clothes in our house. Aaron jogs and his clothes seem to be best off being burned instead of washed, but I have always washed them in hot water. I have changed my ways this month.

For June... I am stopping using plastic at work. I have a plastic cup (disposable) that I drink water out of. That and my plastic utensils (we dont have regular silverware at work) I know are just piling up in a landfill somewhere. So I brought in my own silverware and an extra (non-disposable cup).

I have one in mind for July - hopefully it happens - it may be a big one!

Change of plans

Whew - I have not had a chance to sit down for a while. I am actually working at home today... PG schools are canceled due to power outages. Did we have power outages? No. Is there bad weather today that we should be keeping our kids home for? No. These policies are ridiculous! There were a few schools somewhere in the county that didnt have power. It kind of screws the working parents.

So here are a few photos from recently. Olivia has taken to reading books. She has one favorite that I actually got at a yard sale. She will just sit back and "read" it with me. Here is another of Emma in my garden. And we did find Olivia's "thing" (Emma's is art). Olivia's is music (she has mastered the kazoo already at the age of 10 months!).

Oh - I took a picture of Olivia yesterday. She got quite the shiner at school. This after coming home twice recently with pretty serious bites to her ear and arm. Apparently this time she wasnt in a fight, but she did it to herself (leaning on a toy truck and flipping it up into her face). Ouch!

Is it over yet?

Whew! The past two weeks have been filled with drama and trauma. I have been home sick with Emma more than in the whole year combined. I almost took her to get xrays as well when she fell off the monkey bars at school as well (she suffered from a bruised back and a sprained wrist).

Oh, and I heard from her tonight that she got a "check" at school (a warning of sorts that the kids did something wrong). What for I asked and, after some hesitancy she tells me... she punched a boy in her class... the boy that has been harrasing her and her friends (i.e., touching their butts and hair, etc.). Ok, so I didnt scold her... he deserves it.

As for Olivia, she is all over the place. She actually stood up on her own today for about a second or two. Look at these legs... I love them...

My daughters husband

The other night hubby and I were talking and reflecting on some comments from Emma - one comment being that "Daddy is a servant" and earlier in the day that "mommies are lucky - they always get to relax".

Wow! Clearly her perspective on our household is much different than it was a generation ago in many homes when the dad worked outside the home and the mom was a homemaker. Hubby said that he thought it would be hard for Emma to find a husband because she would have these expections of men (they would cook, clean, grocery shop, take care of their kids, etc., etc.) and he questioned her finding that. I said that I thought that I think that she SHOULD keep her expectations high and I had higher hope that she would find this all in a significant other.

In observing our friends many of the guys are the main cooks in the family or play a signifant role in taking care of the kids, etc., etc. Based on what I am seeing - and I think my daughter is seeing not only at home but at her friends homes - I hope that she sees that men can play these roles as much as women can.

As for my own hubby I DO greatly appreciate all he does (as my "servant") so I can "relax all the time" - not only the cooking, dishes, grocery shopping, story reading, and a ridiculous amount of child centered play with Emma. I cannot imagine doing this all without him!

What a week...

... oh, wait, it is only Wednesday.

Emma is sick. She was home from school for the first time Tuesday with a fever. She didnt seem that sick - she was apparently taking pictures of her dad and sister.... (nice). They even went to the eye doctors as Emma has been complaining about her eyebrows hurting.

We thought she was better then I pick her up and she looks like this... (note the rings under her eyes!). And yes that is a Wendy's frosty she is eating - I thought it would make her feel better.

I was pretty surprised when I picked her up and she looked like hell (what kind of

mom would send her kid to school looking like that?). Then I get to take her to pick out her new glasses (she had already spied a nice pair of purple wire rimmed ones). We looked and looked but when we finally found the purple ones again she was clearly excited. So purple glasses it is for Emma! Poor baby.

Oh, and one more thing I couldnt resist capturing on film... Olivia's need to lick everything. Ew! Yes, this is her licking the door... right after she scooted her little body over there (crawling isnt exactly what she does - it is more like scooting with one leg stuck under her). Whatever works for her.

Just One Thing

Maybe this is not an overly original idea, but I was reading some posts by Eco Mama and her idea of just changing one thing you do a month to something that is a little more environmentally friendly I thought was a good one. I know it is a little ironic that I am an environmental scientist by trade, but I feel like I am not as environmentally friendly as I could be. I have changed most of our lightbulbs over and we try to recycle the best we can, but I know there are a gagillion things I can do better.

So I am going to attempt to do my own "just one thing" starting this month... I have been changing all my cleaning products, laundry detergent, dish soap, etc. over to more environmentally friendly versions of them.

One thing a month can add up right?

You know you are a dc transplant when...

... you loathe the thought of going to cherry blossom "festival". Ok, so Rochester has about a month of summer each year but in that one month they pack in as much outdoor fun as possible in the form of many festivals, with music, art, and lots of beer and wine.

Every year my co-workers and I walk down to the tidal basin to take in the sights during this time and I am always a bit disappointed. Maybe I am missing something. Where is the beer tent?

Or maybe I haven't been as deprived of the sun and haven't had 8 feet of snow in my yard all year. Maybe that is why in Rochester all the summer festivals seemed like such joyous events. Anyway, set up the beer tent and I will be there!

status report

So the baby is crawling. Apparently trying to stand as well. When I got to daycare this afternoon the teacher said that she was crying because she got stuck... essentially in the downward dog yoga position and she couldnt figure out what to do next.

We also got a note from Emma's teacher - she wants a conference with us to discuss Emma. At this point either that is bad or good (the extremes I am thinking as it is getting to be the end of the year).

... and the baby is crying again...

soundly sleeping????

So, baby sleeps horribly.... even worse than her big sister did if that is at all imaginable. I decided, and surprisingly hubby agreed, that we would consult with a sleep expert. After that big decision the woman still hasnt called me back (although she did email me telling me to call her). Since I have not heard from her I have had to take matters into my own hands. I didnt think I would do this but I have resorted to crying it out. In a way it is easier than it was with Emma (we tried it a bit when she was a baby too) but this time I know what I am in store for if I dont fix this sooner than later. I should have done this a few weeks ago before the baby could sit up/stand/crawl.

Anyway, she has been crying off an on all night. I did check on her and she wasnt hungry so I put her back down. She is asleep for the moment. We did this the other night and she slept for two 3.5 hour chunks of time (got up just twice). That is huge for Olivia (she is usually up at least 5 times). Cross your fingers.

sleeping????

I am at my wits end regarding the baby's sleeping. Hubby and I actually agreed that seeking professional help is an acceptable idea. Then by accident this morning something happened. I put baby in her crib to pick up a few things (putting on a new musical toy handed down by a friend - THANK YOU) and before i knew it - baby is sleeping.

So, act 2 this afternoon... what will happen if I put a wide awake baby in her crib with music playing and walk away... I am listening to the baby monitor right now... all I hear is music playing (do I hear snoring).

I am afraid to go and check... cross your fingers that this might lead to a new idea in family sleeping techniques!

Woodys

Not those kind, pervert... I am talking about woody plants. This is my current dilema. I am planning a childrens garden for the back yard. I am really excited about this and have found and thought of some cool things for the garden. However, I cannot figure out what kind of shrubs to put in on one side of the border. I am trying to do better. I have been researching native, non-invasive plants. My soil is clay, neutral pH, it is somewhat shady in this area, and I am looking for something that can withstand some drought (as I am not confident that I will remember to water them). I cannot find anything that fits the bill. I think I have to do some experimentation. And I think I will have to put forth some additional effort to meet at least some of these requirements. I will post some before and after photos in the next few months.

The Hunt

Yesterday we went to a fanastic easter egg hunt. I realized at the end the day that I LOVE egg hunts and easter as well. Easter reminds me of being 5 or 6 and being finally allowed to go into the yard after FEET of snow has finally melted away and the lawn is not quite saturated any more. It reminds me of the daffodils and crocuses starting to finally come up. I was just told that back home there is still snow on the ground today so I guess it is really lucky that we have moved south so easter can still be these things to me (and Emma).

Oh, and for whatever reason, I love filling eggs, hiding them and watching the kids search them out. Hubby and I watched from a distance Emma giving some her eggs to other kids rather than keeping them herself. We were pround. Livvy watched everyone from the porch with me. She talked up a storm - appearing to be sharing her observations and the plan of attack she seems to want to take next year when she can finally participate.

"I want to be a mom too"

So the other night hubby was away. The baby is SO not sleeping still and I am open for trying anything to get a bit more rest. "They" say to introduce a lovey for the baby to become attached to (as opposed to needing mommy all night), oh and even better would be to make the lovey smell like mommy so that it is even more comforting. Ok, (1) find acceptable lovey, (2) wear in shirt for the evening to get that mommy smell (not sure if that is a good thing or not). I have to admit that I was a little embarassed to do this in front of Emma so I did this after the girls were both in bed. A little while later I get a call from Emma's bedroom... I forget lovey in my shirt.

"Mommy (complete with look - you know the look), what is in your shirt)?"

"oh... (go into why I am doing this for the baby)..."

She laughs... "that is so silly. When I grow up I want to be a mom too and I am going to take SUCH good care of my kids." (the inflection in that sentence to me implied that me wearing the lovey in my shirt was that *I* was taking such good care of MY kids. I thought - what a great story. I am going to share that with hubby when he gets back.

A few days later I shared the story... I surprised myself as that I started crying when I told it to him. It was just so sweet to me. :)

breaking down to the pressure

So my wonderful hubby has been hounding me to start this blog. I told him that writing my thoughts down is not something that would come easily to me - it is more of a private journal kind of thing.

Anyway when on earth do i have time? i am currently typing with one hand and nursing the baby with the other. i take pride in multi tasking but it is pretty ridiculous at times... i nursed and changed her at the same time the other night.

Emma said something to me the other night that made me realize that I really dont want to foget these things so I had better start documenting them. I can barely remember my own name so I am not confident that I will remember these beautiful things the girls do a month from now.

So, I am breaking down to the pressure to start documenting my thoughts. I hope no one from work reads this as another reason I want to start doing this is because I have so much time to think and read at work with it being SO SLOW. So, here I go...